Because Mommy is so so tired. And I have to get up at 5:20 a.m. Need I say more?
(Daddy's words now follow)
When I used to take Jack to get bagels on Saturday Morning I would order one bagel for Jack and one for me. The problem with Jack is he likes to eat. Bagels especially. So he would ask for a piece of my bagel after he quickly wolverined his. So here I was being out eaten by a five year old. I couldn't say no... *he will soon be bigger than me after all*. So I switched to ordering two bagels for me and one for jack which really turned into 1.5 for me and 1.5 for jack, but you could see he was really itching to get the extra half of bagel into him. He gets this distended third world belly look to him but seems completely happy with it. Sometimes I would try to slow him down by giving him a bowl of cereal before he left the house, but that didn't work and he would seemingly be just as hungry.
About halfway through his first bagel he would start eyeballing my bagel. He usually had wheat and I had an everything bagel. Before he would say anything I would say "don't be eyeballing my bagel, boy". He would shoot back "Awww come on dad, I'm hungry". But you ate cereal, juice and part of mom's breakfast before we left the house. I'm picturing fighting him for food when I'm 60 and I'm not going to win that one. He eyes the menu, bored, calculatingly, then he begins with the pitch..."those egg sandwiches look really good. Look, breakfast all day!" I'm like yeah, breakfast all day. That's what you need.