It's not difficult for me. I can get up early, make it to the trail, or boot camp class at 6am, and then work my butt off. That's not the hard part, believe it or not. The hard part is trying to convince a 5-year-old that this is something that Mommy has to do. MUST do. Not a choice in the world. Believe me if there was actually a choice, as in...I'm 20 pounds lighter with a happy-go-lucky attitude 24/7...then by all means I would skip the morning hour-long grueling visit with the pavement or trail. But alas, I need to do this sh*t for SO many reasons. And therefore, I have to also be able to leave the house either undetected, or with everyone's full support, knowing that I'll be back in a little over an hour.
I was saying goodnight to Jack and the subject came up. I was THIS close to getting out of that room. This close! Sigh.
Jack: Mom, is tomorrow a boot camp day?
me: Nope. That's Monday.
me: But, tomorrow I'm going for a run before you and Daddy get up.
Jack: Noooooooo! I don't like it when you go for a run!
me: You're asleep honey, and you won't even know...
Jack: I always know. I don't like waking up and you're not here.
me: How about if I get back before you wake up.
Jack: I always wake up! And you know what? When I call "Mommy" then Daddy comes up to get me. He doesn't even know his own name!
me: That's because he knows I'm not home, so he comes to check on you. How about you call for Daddy tomorrow morning if you wake up early. Then he'll come up and get you and everything will be okay?
Jack: It's never okay. He says it's too early to get up, or else he lays down on my bed and starts snoring. Then I'm all by myself again anyway.
me: (stifling a laugh) Ohhh, that doesn't sound like fun.
Jack: You know what the worst part is? When I wake up then I know you're not here and then I'm all alone and that makes me sad. (lip trembles...) Sniff...
me: Oh sweetie, I love that you miss me, but Mommies have to do some things by themselves sometimes. It's very important. It helps us become better at being a Mommy.
Jack: Just be a good Mommy without going running!
me: I wish I could.
Jack: Anything you wish can come true...my teacher said that. Or is it anything you dream? I think it's dream.
me: Okay goodnight.
Jack: But are you still going running?
me: Yep. And guess what?
me: I'll come back before you even wake up. So when you do wake up, call for Daddy. Then I'll come up and get you and you can pretend I don't remember what my own name is.
Jack: Ha ha!
me: What if you called for Mommy and Grandpa Louie showed up to get you?
Jack: What the---? Ha ha ha. Grandpa Louie...that's funny! What if Uncle John showed up.
me: Yeah, he'd be all tired like "What do you want...I'm trying to sleep over here"...
Jack: (cracks up at the funny thoughts)
me: Are you ok?
Jack: Yeah. Are you still going running?
Jack: Sigh... See? We're right back where we started like 6 hours ago. Sigh...