Tuesday, June 8, 2010

An afternoon at (trying to get to) the Farm

I recently purchased a weekly veggie box from a local farm. We paid for the season, and then pick up a box of fresh produce once a week. Sometimes the box includes herb plants in soil, or a dozen fresh eggs! It's very exciting not knowing what you'll get each week. And you have to be creative to use up all the exotics (as I call them), such as kale, garlic scapes and kohlrabi. If all else fails...veggie stew!

I picked up Jack's friend Gavin, so that he could join us at the farm and have a little time with Jack. They are totally nuts for each other in the only way that boys know how. (Can you say "pew, pew, pew!!" lasers, and guns and shooting? I mean really, even if you don't let them have or play with guns of any kind, they will use sticks and straws and legos and fashion every type of firearm known to man.)

I offered to pick up my neighbor's box also, to save her a trip. She informed me that she had ordered two chickens and I would have to pay cash to get them. No not live chickens, dummy, cooked! We all made that same mistake. :)

me: Guys, hey, guys! Listen, I have to stop at the ATM to get some cash before we go to the farm.
guys: AWWW! We don't want to stop!!!
me: How about, no choice?
Gavin: Yayyy, we can shoot at other people in the bank.
Jack: Yeahhhh! pew pew pew!
me: No, keep your hands in the car, and you can only shoot at trees. Don't aim at people's faces like that! (the poor woman in the car next to me trying to do her drive-up banking...really feared for her life I think!)
Jack: Look, cool! You drive up and it gives you money!
me: Ummm, why is my PIN not working on this?? GRRRR. (I try another ATM, and same deal). Both are not working?? How am I supposed to ... oh the heck with it... maybe it's broken and the farm will take a credit card.

We drive to the farm and with all the noise coming from the backseat, I fail to notice that I sailed right by the farm entrance. We bounce down a dirt road into unfamiliar territory.

me: Uhhh, I think we missed the turn. Did you guys see a sign or something?
guys: Pew Pew Pew!!!
me: Sigh. (I notice a guy driving a tractor and have to flag him down) Hi, is the farm entrance near here?
tractor guy: You drove right by it, heh heh.
me: Yeah I know. I have 2 knuckleheads in the back that are very distracting. haha.
guys: Heeyyyyyyyy...
me: okay thanks. Guys, we have to turn around.
guys: AWWWWW! We don't want to turn around!
me: Sigh.

We get to the farm and I go grab the two farm boxes. Gavin and Jack run around, so I have to keep a sharp eye on them. I fail to notice the sign that says you have to go inside to get your eggs and herb plants. Meanwhile I'm calling Dennis on my phone to ask him if the PIN numbers have changed on our two accounts. I barely get reception and the phone keeps hanging up. Oh well.

me: Excuse me, I need to pick up 2 chickens for my neighbor and...
farm lady: Name?
me: Mine? Oh, you mean... ha ha, HER last name?
farm lady: Hey Toby! Can you go grab the chickens!!!!!???? (she screeches in my face, and a 12-year old boy scurries off)
me: Here's the deal, I don't have cash, heh heh, on me because...well it's a long story but my ATMs weren't working
farm lady: More than one?
me: Yeah, well I tried two cards and... (my phone rings) Excuse me a sec... Hello? What? Did you talk to the bank? Hello? (I hang up)... So as I was saying, I don't have any cash on me per se, but I can charge the chickens or leave my credit card number and come back tomorrow with cash?

( I really didn't want my neighbor to have to drive all the way back out here when I was already here! )

farm lady: We would need a check or cash please.
me: (muttering) Dammit! (I fumble through my purse and notice that Dennis has taken my checkbook to pay some bills). Well I don't have a checkbook on me but...
farm lady: Um sorry?
me: (phone rings again) Hello?
Dennis: Why the heck aren't you answering your phone?
me: Really? I'm in a valley of death right here... Gavin! Jack! Come back over here please!
Dennis: The bank says everything is fine and they saw that you tried two cards and had two bad transactions. Maybe you punched in the wrong numbers?
me: On BOTH cards??? Impossible! (phone dies again...) Hello?? Sigh...

(I give up and call my neighbor apologizing profusely for my uselessness. She asks me to see if she can pick the chickens up tomorrow. I check with farm lady and she says ok. So we all get in the car to leave.)

Jack: Pew Pew Pew! (shooting his finger at a guy heading into the farm.)
me: Jack, stop! Don't point like that!
Jack: Why, do they think they'll really get hurt? Cool!
me: Sigh.

(We drive back to Gavin's and drop him off. It is then that I realize that I was supposed to pick up a dozen eggs and the potted herb plants. I want to weep.)

me: Um, Jack? We have to take a quick drive back to the farm...I forgot the eggs...
Jack: Waaahhhhhh, I don't WANT to go baaaaccckkkkkk...
me: Oh forget it.

(We head back to my neighbor's, drop off the box and explain the situation)
me: Sooo, if you could... pick up both sets of herbs and eggs AND your chickens? heh heh? (Really, did I save anyone an ounce of time today?)

The best part of the story is that I noticed that my ATM cards had been switched in my wallet. They look amazingly similar I tell you! Therefore I HAD been punching in the wrong PIN number for each card. Heh, heh...Ahem.

Jack: That was fun! Can we do it again??? I love farm boxes and I'm gonna help you cook all the vegetables!
me: More fun next week Jack. More fun next week...


  1. I think i stumbled upon the "Shit Debi Did today" website by accident.

  2. Well, I am a big part of this boy's afternoon! And yes, this post is a bit more me-centric than most, so I agree. :)